I have spent so long being in denial, not accepting myself, trying to overcompensate because of my weight, trying to hide my eating habits, living with regrets, and never really living. There are messages that say similar things, "you are only as sick as your secrets." I had never fully recognized the amount of conversation with lack of integrity that goes on inside my head until embracing the current therapy I am receiving. There are many things I hear that embrace the same thought.... If you are going to workout, then set a manageable goal. Ask yourself realistically how much you can workout each week and when you reach that goal, you feel good. If you set an unrealistic goal and you don't meet it, it does more damage to yourself. When you set out to try and lose weight by changing and cleaning up your diet, you do so in a manageable way. Otherwise, you will continue to let yourself down and over the years it just compounds. That WAS me. The point is...whenever you let yourself down, it makes you feel bad. Of course, not being a woman of my word to myself and others feels terrible, but did you really know how often and how much you are actually living your life without integrity? This is an impactful word for me. I add it to my list of big meaning words: mindfulness, intuitive, acceptance, integrity and spirit.
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